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Haddayr Copley-Woods [userpic]

What a Minnesotan really means

January 28th, 2012 (02:35 pm)

Having lived in Minnesota for more than 18 years now, and influenced by the table of Britishisms explained, I have decided to go into public service. You're welcome, transplants to Minnesota!

What a Minnesotan SaysWhat s/he meansWhat the transplant thinks
"I'll get right on that!"I will never do this.This will be done very quickly!
"Um, I guess that might be okay."No.Yes.
"That's different."I hate that.He likes my unusual choices!
"Maybe you should think about . . ."DROP EVERYTHING AND DO THIS NOW.She's offering me her thoughts.
[longish pause] "Yeah, that's [smallish pause] good!"That is disgusting. Do not ever order this under any circumstances.What I am about to order at this restaurant is good and I will enjoy it.
"It's a mite nippy out!"It is 30 degrees below zero with a wind chill of minus 60.Perhaps I should put on a sweater!
"Wow! It was so nice to meet you!"Goodbye.I made a great impression on that guy!
"This was a great conversation. We will definitely get back in touch with you!"Get the fuck out of my office and thank you for wasting my time.I TOTALLY nailed that interview!
"You know, other guys might shovel the snow downwind."Oh Christ you are an idiot.He thinks I'm an idiot.
"Can you borrow me a dollar?"Will you loan me a dollar?What the hell is this person asking me? What is happening? i don't need to borrow a dollar someone help me
"Nice day, eh?"why do we live here this crushing hellish nightmare of my existence is best borne quietlyWow. This person thinks icy slush and hail is pleasant weather.
"Oh, I don't know about that . . ."You are wrong; you are completely talking out of your ass. If you don't stop talking about this I will punch you right in the jaw.This person does not know much about this topic or is very mildly disagreeing with me. I shall try to explain why I am right!
"Have a nice day."Goodbye.That person wants me to have a nice day!
"Have a super nice day!"Go fuck yourself.That person REALLY wants me to have a nice day!


Comments

Posted by: geniusofevil (geniusofevil)
Posted at: January 29th, 2012 04:05 am (UTC)

okay, this is hilarious! Love the shoveling snow one. Man ... lol

Are you this funny on fb? Please say no, I don't want to have to go there to read your brilliance. FB is evil, ask any one. It makes me itchy.

Posted by: Haddayr Copley-Woods (haddayr)
Posted at: January 29th, 2012 05:43 am (UTC)

I am only funny LOOKING on FB.

Posted by: geniusofevil (geniusofevil)
Posted at: January 29th, 2012 05:47 am (UTC)

Listen 'twin' when you say you are funny looking you are saying I am funny looking and my kid already told me today that I have a mustache so just back. the. hell. off.

Posted by: Haddayr Copley-Woods (haddayr)
Posted at: January 29th, 2012 05:48 am (UTC)

OH GOD I ALSO HAVE A MUSTACHE WE NEED TO WAX

Posted by: geniusofevil (geniusofevil)
Posted at: January 29th, 2012 05:50 am (UTC)

I'm bleaching first. Isn't that better?

Oh, god, why do I have a mustache? Is it because I'm atheist?

Posted by: Haddayr Copley-Woods (haddayr)
Posted at: January 29th, 2012 05:51 am (UTC)

yes

Posted by: geniusofevil (geniusofevil)
Posted at: January 29th, 2012 05:53 am (UTC)

I come from a long line of bearded women, perhaps it's best that all I have is soup strainer

Posted by: Haddayr Copley-Woods (haddayr)
Posted at: January 29th, 2012 05:58 am (UTC)

count your blessings sister

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