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PLUCKY CRIPPLES DON'T LET LACK OF BINGO CARD STOP THEM

February 13th, 2010 (10:15 am)
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I asked for help and you delivered! Here's the final disability bingo card for reporters! Folks seemed like they wanted one for Stuff People Say To You, so I might tackle that one next. Please use this all you want; if you want to credit someone please don't. I did this in a hurry and got a ton of these from my blog readers and dot_gimp_snark, but I did a terrible job of keeping track of who suggested what.



Text in card above:
Are you writing an article that profiles or even tangentially involves a disabled person? Make it easy on yourself: string together these words and phrases with a few voyeuristic references to the person's body parts, and call it a day!

She didn't let her disability stop her!
Differently Abled/Handi-capable/Challenged/Some other twee or awkward phrase
Forced to use [mobility device]
Thought she would never get to [some activity most of us never get to do]
Courageous battle
He relies on [friends/a guide dog. No fair using electricity!]
Confined to a wheelchair
Then tragedy struck/her dreams were shattered/the unimaginable happened
. . . wants to help others [the 'bless him' is inferred]
Will never again see his childrens' faces/canoe the boundary waters/run a marathon
Can only communicate through [communication device]
Cheerful/ Never let it get her down/ Positive attitude
Free Space:
BRAVE & INSPIRATIONAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Through the miraculous assistance of [something completely non-miraculous]
She refused to give up/give in/succumb
Defying overwhelming odds
She 'suffers from' [impairment]
If you saw her sitting down/lying still/riding the bus, you would never know that she has a disability...
[insert some pseudoscience]
Determination
Most of us could never imagine [horrific impairment] happening to us, but...
Every day she has to [take some medication/do some physical therapy]
Special
He has overcome his disability!
. . . proving you can achieve anything if you really try!

Comments

Posted by: MG Ellington (xjenavivex)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 04:19 pm (UTC)

you rock my socks

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Posted by: DebW (deborahw37)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 04:31 pm (UTC)

Can I just say how brave an inspirational you are to have defied overwhelming odds and made me snorfle in an unbecoming fashion.

Sadly your very special, unfailing good humour in the face of unimaginable adversity has rendered me incapable of typing a simple comment

Apologies for the edits



Edited at 2010-02-13 04:33 pm (UTC)

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Posted by: Haddayr Copley-Woods (haddayr)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 04:59 pm (UTC)
 laughing

HA

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(Deleted comment)
Posted by: Haddayr Copley-Woods (haddayr)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 04:56 pm (UTC)

Ooh, yes -- one based on being the parent of a disabled kid!

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Posted by: -pd- (pgdudda)
Posted at: February 15th, 2010 02:18 am (UTC)
 Audiogram

Don't forget to include a space that says "...but your child is doing so well academically, we don't need to address their non-academic and/or social issues!"

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Posted by: witchsistah (witchsistah)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 05:06 pm (UTC)

You forgot to add, "Didn't mind random mofos asking them about their condition including asking them how their various bodily functions actually do function and expect a polite, calm answer to such rude, intrusive-ass questions."

Edited at 2010-02-13 05:08 pm (UTC)

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Posted by: Haddayr Copley-Woods (haddayr)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 05:10 pm (UTC)

Heh, heh.

I am getting enough responses that I think I might do one for Stupid Shit People Say, although that one might get so huge we'll need twelve bingo cards.

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Posted by: burgundy (burgundy)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 06:16 pm (UTC)

Will the free space be "But I was just trying to HELP"?

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Posted by: Haddayr Copley-Woods (haddayr)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 06:21 pm (UTC)

ooooh see we're starting to create it already!

I wish I could make a visual version that was less crap-tastic, though. I should put out a call for folks who can do a better job.

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Posted by: Cody B. (codeman38)
Posted at: February 15th, 2010 03:26 pm (UTC)
 think different

I'd be willing to help put one together, if you're interested. Could even make it into a nice printable PDF.

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Posted by: Haddayr Copley-Woods (haddayr)
Posted at: February 15th, 2010 03:32 pm (UTC)
really?

Thank you!

If you do, I wanted to add one thing to the section with the "will never see his children's faces again" on the suggestion of a hearing-impaired person on the list: adding: "hear his children say 'I love you.'

Would you like me to give you the Word doc, or can you use the html underneath the image?

I appreciate this; all I did was do it in Word and then do a screen capture, which . . . well, it's hard to read, as you can see.

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Posted by: Cody B. (codeman38)
Posted at: February 15th, 2010 04:19 pm (UTC)
Re: really?
 Osaka

OK, I'll update that and send an updated PDF to you. And I'll convert it to PNG for posting on LJ too.

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Posted by: R. Francis Smith (rfrancis)
Posted at: February 14th, 2010 06:30 am (UTC)
 cane

I kid you not, I was getting a haircut a few days ago when the stylist blurted out, "So what's with the cane?"

Me: "..."

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Posted by: burgundy (burgundy)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 06:34 pm (UTC)

By the way, check out this obit. I think they might have managed to avoid all of these. I think it's actually pretty awesome.

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Posted by: Haddayr Copley-Woods (haddayr)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 06:40 pm (UTC)

Oh, wow. Thank you.

I'm writing her a thank-you note.

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Posted by: witchsistah (witchsistah)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 08:48 pm (UTC)

Wow, how 'bout that, actually writing about what he DID rather than fetishizing his disability! Yanno. That may actually WORK!

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Posted by: The Patriotic Earthling (orbitaldiamonds)
Posted at: February 17th, 2010 12:52 am (UTC)

That was very well done. XD

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Posted by: Naomi (naomikritzer)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 06:46 pm (UTC)

Everyone else beat me to the joke I was going to make, so I will just go with, YOU ARE AWESOME.

Plus ITA with the crying need for a matching card for "stupid shit you read in newspaper articles about parenting a child with a disability." And there's always a need for a "stupid shit people say" bingo card.

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Posted by: Flitterby (flit)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 07:22 pm (UTC)

Snorkalicious!

Have you seen the invisible illness bingo card? It has a good subset of 'stupid shit people say.'

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Posted by: R. Francis Smith (rfrancis)
Posted at: February 14th, 2010 06:31 am (UTC)

I love that one, because the very first top-left square is my #1 pet peeve thing that PEOPLE. KEEP. SAYING.

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Posted by: Flitterby (flit)
Posted at: February 14th, 2010 08:05 am (UTC)

I get a ton of "you just don't think positive enough!" Also, "Try this magic juice/berry/scary-elixir-marketed-only-on-the-web, it fixed a friend of a friend!"

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Posted by: Jessie (orbitalmechanic)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 07:51 pm (UTC)

It's so great that your disability has taught me these lessons.

The "you would never know" line really made me cringe. Let's make EVERYONE have a bad coming-out experience! (Maybe it caught my eye because I had a very weird moment the other day, talking to other parents about flu vaccinations. I realized that for the first time I have friends who know all about Violet, but don't know she's adopted. Used to be it came up right away because people were still talking about pregnancy and breastfeeding.)

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Posted by: Maevele (maevele)
Posted at: February 13th, 2010 08:50 pm (UTC)

you win

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Posted by: Rae (kittenrae)
Posted at: February 14th, 2010 01:08 am (UTC)

*lol* Love it!

BTW - off topic. Saw this article and thought you might appreciate it.

http://biosingularity.wordpress.com/2010/02/13/new-clue-why-autistic-people-dont-want-hugs/

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Posted by: Haddayr Copley-Woods (haddayr)
Posted at: February 14th, 2010 01:50 am (UTC)

Interesting; this is probably part of why brushing with a surgical brush helps; I imagine the stimulation helps the neurons to fire and develop.

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Posted by: Jesse the K (jesse_the_k)
Posted at: February 14th, 2010 02:55 am (UTC)
 loved it all

Yes! Yes! Yes!

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Posted by: The Empress of Ice Cream (icecreamempress)
Posted at: February 14th, 2010 03:17 am (UTC)

I will never again canoe my children's faces, now that I'm confined to my bootstraps.

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Posted by: Jackie Wones (little_octagon)
Posted at: February 15th, 2010 04:04 am (UTC)
 HankWTF?!

Cool! The bingo card makes it seem like you can have a high quality of life. You know, for a differently-abled person.

PS: FTW FTW FTW

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Posted by: kaya (morelikeherself)
Posted at: February 15th, 2010 06:26 pm (UTC)

Greatest.

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Posted by: The Patriotic Earthling (orbitaldiamonds)
Posted at: February 17th, 2010 12:52 am (UTC)

That is freaking awesome. Definitely adding this to sidetrackedery once I get home from visiting family. :D

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Posted by: Becky (alicornmoon)
Posted at: July 15th, 2010 03:23 am (UTC)

What I hate is the whole 'I know someone who is more disabled (re: in a wheelchair) then you that does such and such job so you should be able to do that and more' able bodied friends :P
Yes, don't you know we are all the same person and if we aren't in wheelchairs it doesn't count as a real disability :P. Plus, we will take any job just to be oh so proud we have one because we can't be picky:P

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